Chuggin' Along

While there really isn't much to report, I thought I might as well update and post some pictures of Jasper on the blog.

Things are pretty boring in the Richardson house. Jasper and I ended up spending most of last week in Worland visiting Grandma & Grandpa. We had a great time with my family, and Jasper even got to go to his first museum.

He's growing like a weed, and has already outgrown most of his newborn-sized clothes. This is something we're not used to, so it never ceases to surprise me how quickly he grows! He's such a wonderful baby...I absolutely love having such a cuddle bug! It's so hard to believe that he'll already be six weeks old on Saturday. In a way, it seems like time has just flown by, but on the other hand, it seems like we've had him forever and that he's always been a part of our lives.

Kisses for Kerrigan

For those of you who haven't already heard, I've started a new blog called "Kisses For Kerrigan." You can find it at http://kissesforkerrigan.blogspot.com/ For a little bit, I was journaling about the loss of Kerrigan, but then I decided that a better, more productive outlet would be to blog about it. I don't want to make it depressing, so I plan to post pictures, videos, memories, and uplifting quotes about our sweet little girl. I hope it will help with the healing process; not just on my part, but for our family and friends, as well.

How Life Changes...

"You are life,
And you lived.
You gave what you needed to give.
Forever ours. Forever His.
The greatest gift was always you."

It's hard to think that it's only been a month...one month, 3 days, 10 hours and 30 minutes as I write this opening sentence. To me, it seems like a lifetime, and not one that I am entirely eager to repeat. Granted, things have changed and things have remained the same, and our world has been turned on its axis more than once. But we're still holding on, still holding each other up, and still holding true to the faith that we know will lead us back to our daughter someday.

I'll be the first to admit that life isn't easy. In fact, there are days when it's downright unbearable. There are times when the tears come for no particular reason, and then there are times when I'll find something of hers in some random spot and I can't stop from breaking down. I break down over a toothbrush in the closet, while walking through the girls' toy aisle at Wal-Mart, over cheesy potato soup, whenever I hear the primary sing, and just about every time I see a little girl about her age. The worst times are at night as I sit in the nursery, rocking Jasper back to sleep. I can't help but think about how great a big sister she would have been, and how excited she was for Jasper to arrive. I know that they got to spend some time together between her leaving and his arrival, but I only wish that they had spent time together so that I could see.

With Jasper's arrival, it feels like I have two separate families. I feel guilty for having family pictures taken without her in them...almost like it feels like by doing so, we've cut her out of the family. We do everything we can to make it feel like she's still a part of our every day lives. We tell her "good night" before bed every night, placed a picture of her in Jasper's crib so that she can be watching over him, even leave her things lying around the house as much as possible. There are times when I can almost believe that she's just at preschool, then spending the night at her grandparents' house. Then there are the times when the house just feels so incredibly empty without her constant laughter and the sound of her feet running through the kitchen. I miss her happy cry of "Mommy!" as she wrapped herself around my leg when I picked her up from preschool or daycare.

Of course, having our new little addition helps to ease some of the pain. Jasper is an absolutely wonderful baby, and we couldn't be happier (in a manner of speaking). He's a joy to our family, and is everything we could have asked for in a son. Time will tell if it'll stick, but for now, in the short two and a half weeks that he's been with us, our lives have been so blessed. We know that Heavenly Father has sent us another choice spirit, and that he was specially prepared before being sent to us. Speaking of being sent to us, Jasper was born on 12/11/2010 at 5:00 p.m. He weighed 6 pounds, 12 ounces, and was 18-1/2 inches long. I was induced at 2:30 p.m. because the doctors suspected I was experiencing preeclampsia and my blood pressure was soaring. The labor was fast, to say the least. We figured Kerrigan was ready to kick Jasper out and slam the door behind him, as she so often did with family members who visited her bedroom.



Jasper's growing like a weed, having grown out of preemie clothes in a week and now filling out newborn sized clothes quite well. He's such a calm, easy-going baby, only crying when he's hungry or has messy pants. He's content to lounge around in his Boppy pillow or in his swing, or to simply snuggle up to Mommy or Daddy and just fall asleep. It's definintely taken some adjustment on Brandon's and my part because we're so used to having a child who was so demanding of our attention and who consumed every minute of our lives. We wouldn't have had it any other way, but starting over, seemingly from scratch, with a new little one has been a challenge. We're not first-time parents who are learning all of this for the first time, but it just seems odd to have just the three of us in the house...it hasn't been that way since 2006. It makes me wonder if we will ever have an earthly family of more than three.

As for Brandon and I...we're getting along. Brandon has taken a hiatus from the nursing program during the spring semester and will start back up again where he left off next fall. I'll be taking online courses through UW/Casper College and staying home with Jasper. We're still just trying to get by one day at a time. It's a long road that lies ahead and often times it feels like we'retaking two steps backward for every step we take forward. But it helps to have each other to lean on as we make our way along the path to our Celestial child and our eternal family.

Jasper's First Christmas

Kerrigan's Christmas tree at CRC Preschool

Kerrigan's Angel Tree

Even More Catching Up!

We've got a lot of catching up to do, and since there's so much, I'm basically going to let the pictures do the talking!

Kerrigan started her second year of preschool at CRC, and loves it! She also got to start attending a second preschool at NWC. It's been good prep for kindergarten next year, since she goes to CRC from 8:15-10:15, has a short break at home, then to NWC at 11:00 until 4:30. It's been especially nice, since I've been doing my teaching practicum at the high school, so Kerrigan gets to spend less time in daycare and more time in school.

We've done some home improvements over the past few months in preparation for Jasper's arrival. We finished the basement family room/playroom, moved Kerrigan into the room formerly known as the playroom, and got the nursery finished. Here's some pictures of Kerrigan's new room.

Here's some pictures of the nursery, done in a dinosaur motif! (I couldn't help myself!)

And here are a couple pictures of the completed basement family room/playroom.

The latest happening around our house was Halloween. Not a huge deal, but here's a couple pictures. I'll post more when I get them from the in-laws!

We're over halfway finished with the semester, which means Brandon's almost 1/4 of the way finished with nursing school! Advising Day was this Tuesday, and Brandon got all registered for classes next semseter. It shouldn't be too stressful a semester, with only 9 credits worth of nursing classes in addition to digital photography, which is his "fun class." I'll be doing on-line courses through Casper College so that I'm able to work towards my Bachelor's and stay at home with Jasper. It'll be an entirely new experience for me, staying home full time, which is something I haven't done since the first year after Kerrigan was born.

Anyway, that's our update for now. Hopefully I won't be too long after Thanksgiving that I update again, and hopefully next time I update, we'll have a new addition to the family!

It's A Boy!!

If you read our blog, you've probably already heard, but we had our ultrasound yesterday. Unfortunately, the little bugger was being unphotogenic (upside down and facing backwards), but we did manage to get the information that we've been anxiously awaiting! We're having a little boy! The newest member of the family, arriving in mid-December, is Jasper Moody Richardson!

Kerrigan's 4th Birthday

Yesterday (the 25th) was Kerrigan's fourth birthday. Talk about time flying! It was the third birthday that she's celebrated in Powell, and it seems they just get crazier with time! But, I guess I should be thankful that it's only one party a year. Come next year, I'll be doing two birthday parties a year! The theme for Kerrigan's party this year was "Christmas in July," thought up by my mom. I decided to go with it because of a running joke between Brandon and I. I love watching QVC's Christmas in July specials, and it just so happens that the day Kerrigan was born, they were showing them all day. Well, while we were hanging out in the delivery room, Brandon kind of became captain of the tv remote and refused to let me watch QVC. So, because I was the one in labor and doing all the work and he denied me my one simple pleasure, he's never been able to live it down, and I take joy in rubbing it in his face! So, without further ado, here's some pictures from Kerrigan's big day!

Catching Up

Although nothing greatly remarkable has occurred over the past few months, I figured it was time for a brief update. First off, I had an ultrasound done on June 22 to finalize my due date (still December 11). The ultrasound machine is a little antiquated, so the picture isn't that great. But, here's the first picture of our new little bugger:

My next appointment is this coming Tuesday, during which we'll schedule our actual ultrasound and hopefully be able to determine whether we've got a little Jasper or Alora on our hands.

In other news, Kerrigan did a session of gymnastics this summer. Needless to say that she's not the most coordinated little girl out there (she is, indeed, her mother's daughter). We did managae to get a few pictures during one of her last classes.

We also went camping at Hyattville this past weekend with Brandon's parents. It was a pretty uneventful weekend, but we did manage to get a few pictures of Kerrigan goofing off around camp.